The Dog Oscars

Catching up on some things I wrote and distributed to my super exclusive email list, but never got around to posting here. 

This is a recap from the first night of the Westminster dog show, which was held on February 16, 2016. Dogs rule. 

The Hound Group

More diverse than its name implies, the group includes sight hounds and scent hounds and lie around on the couch and destroy your shoe collection hounds. There are two sizes of actual Beagles plus three dogs that look like Beagles, if Beagles were the size of Labrador Retrievers. The most ancient of dog breeds are part of this group – the Afghan Hound and the Pharaoh Hound – plus more recently developed breeds for sport hunting in the US – the American Foxhound and the American English Coonhound.

Note to potential owners: Although most are highly sociable and make great companion animals, these dogs were bred to track, hunt (and some to kill) other animals. Not necessarily the dogs to own if you also enjoy the company of cats, hamsters, rabbits or other prey-type animals.

Dog in the group that is smarter than you: the Basenji. Intelligent, obstinate, sneaky – they understand what you want them to do, they’re just not sure they care. A great dog for people who are still emotionally attached to a high maintenance ex-girlfriend.

Perennial crowd favorite: the Basset Hound, because how can you not love a dog where part of the breed description is “long, velvety ears”.

Group winner: the Borzoi, Lucy. A stunningly elegant super athlete. Only the Saluki combines as much beauty and grace with speed and agility.

Criminally overlooked: the Redbone Coonhound. Didn’t even get a glance as the judge passed her when selecting the group finalists. Coonhounds generally don’t have a lot of prestige at Westminster. A fact which hurts their confidence not at all.  

The Toy Group

Group winner: a black and white Shih Tzu named Panda, sporting a $500 cut and blow out, wearing a topknot cinched by a turquoise hair barrette that matched his handler’s dress.

And that’s pretty much all you need to know about the toy group.

Oh, alright. There are 23 breeds in the toy group. Though like the Beagles and Coonhounds in the hound group, multiple versions of the same dog are considered distinct breeds, due to color combinations or type of coat (curly or flat, short or long). So the group includes two Chihuahuas, two English Toy Spaniels, the nearly identical looking Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, three Terriers, and two toy versions of regular sized dogs (the Poodle and the Manchester Terrier).

Easily mistaken for an Ewok: The Brussels Griffon.

Most awkward styling: the handler for the Chinese Crested. Do not have the same haircut as your dog. Especially when it looks better on the dog.

The Non-Sporting Group

Every contest needs a “catch all” category, and this is it at Westminster. These are all purpose dogs. The group includes some breeds which are ancient, like the Shar-Pei and Chow Chow; and others that are of more recent or of indeterminate origin, such as the Dalmation and French Bulldog. Despite some very popular breeds, the non-sporting group does not tend to produce many best in show winners. The last time dogs from the non-sporting group prevailed were in back-to-back wins in 2001 and 2002 by a Bichon Frise and a Miniature Poodle.

Group winner: Annabelle, the lumbering English Bulldog, who narrowly beat out a Disney-worthy Dalmation.

Sighs of embarrassment: for the handler who was wearing a snappy plaid suit, roughly matching the coloring of her dog, and perhaps absentmindedly tucked a white dishtowel into the waistband at the back of her skirt. Trotted energetically around the ring, looking like she had just come from the toilet.

The Herding Group

Note to potential owners: These are intelligent, focused, high energy dogs. They will herd everything from sheep to cattle to toddlers. Some were bred to do so over variable terrain and long distances. Like many of the hunting dogs in the hound group, few are adaptable to apartment living unless they get a lot of exercise.

I have to admit I fell asleep before the judging for the herding group started. The odds-on favorite to win Best in Show is in this group, and she did in fact win last night, to roars from the crowd.

Group winner: Rumor, the German Shepherd. You do not have to love dogs to love this dog. Wow. Hoping she takes Best in Show tomorrow (unless the Brittany wins the sporting group!).

Big shout out: To the handlers throughout the evening who would give their dogs a discreet smooch while taking them off the podium or after trotting around the ring. So genuine and sweet.